Epilogue

One last thing:

I was listening without judgment to a friend on the phone and then while writing the last blog entry it came to me in a flash:

We must forgive God.

I believe that everything that happened to me was part of a plan. I do not question God whereas a lot of people pin down human suffering on him. The friend felt I had overcome the diagnosis and turned it to my advantage.

Some people blame God. I do not. I've read The Way of Thomas and have come to understand that human beings are flawed and Jesus tried to get us to see the error of our ways and we rejected his teachings.

The schizophrenia: having it and being given it seems so unfair yet I don't deal in fairness. I believe I can go out and make things fair by lobbying others to choose recovery. I can help level the playing field by working as a mental health activist.

Only this too: recovery is our number-one job. It is our job to better ourselves and in so doing we make the world a better place.

Truly healing begins when we decide to love ourselves and live our lives with empathy for others.

So I urge you:

Forgive God.